Monday, March 28, 2011
Monday, March 21, 2011
Brooker Online Script
SNOW SCREEN
BROOKER SITTING AT NEWS DESK
"Before long a standard news report, visual language established itself. One that is immediately recognizable to anyone. Me has this report."
CUT TO SHOT OF THREE SKYSCRAPERS
"It starts here, with a lackluster establishing shot of a significant location."
CHARLIE ON A CITY STREET WITH PLAIN FOLKS AROUND HIM
"Next a walkie-talkie preamble from the orator, pacing steadily towards the lens, punctuating every other sentence with a hand gesture, and ignoring all the pricks milling around him like he's gliding through the fucking matrix, before coming to a halt and posing a question. What comes next?"
CUT TO FIVE PEOPLE WALKING SLOWLY TOWARDS THE CAMERA
FADE TO STEEL WALKWAY WITH TWO PEOPLE WALKING TOWARDS EACHOTHER
SLOWLY FADE TO WALKWAY, MONOCHROME FACTS ON STILL SCREEN
"Often something like this a fellow shot designed to give your eyes something to look at while my voice babbles on about facts. Sometimes it will slow down to a halt and monochrome and some of those facts will appear one by one on the screen."
SIX CONSECUTIVE QUICK SHOTS OF OVERWEIGHT PEOPLE
"This is followed by the obligatory shots of overweight people, with their faces subtly framed out, after which the report is padded out with a selection of lazy and pointless vox pops."
CUT TO VOX POP #1
"Um, you usually get some inane chatter from people."
QUICK CUT TO VOX POP #2
"I think they have too much. I think what we want to hear is what is actually happening and not what other people think."
QUICK CUT TO VOX POP #3
"I hate these same sound bites. I don't want some bunter's opinion usually. No!"
SHOT OF PEOPLE BUZZING THROUGH
CUT TO THREE DIFFERENT 2 SECOND CLIPS OF TIME LAPSED SHOTS OF PEOPLE WALKING AROUND ON THE STREETS
QUICK CUT TO DOWDY MAN OPENING MAIL IN KITCHEN
"Another bit of dull, visual abstraction to plug another gap now before the report segways gracefully into a bit of human interest, courtesy of a dowdy man opening letters in a kitchen, and explaining how he's been effected by the issue."
CUT TO DOWDY MAN LOOKING DOWN AT MAIL
MAN TALKING
"When I'm watching the new, I don't really...you know there's a person talking to me telling me what's going on and I don't really listen to what they're saying. It's just news. It's just news."
CUT TO CHART
SILHOUETTE OF AVERAGE FAMILY
"He unfortunately was boring. So to wake you up this is an animated chart, this is a silhouette representing the average family..."
LIGHT HOUSE KEEPER GETTING BEHEADED BY LAZER BEAM
"And this is a light house keeper being beheaded by a lazer beam."
CUT TO FIVE QUICK SHOTS OF PEOPLE WALKING, TAKING PHOTOS, AND A PIPE IN A WINDOW
"As we near the end of the report illustrative shots of pedestrians, and signs, and a pipe in the window."
BROOKER BACK ON SCREEN ON STREET
RISE SIGN OFF TO THE SIGN REGENT STREET
"And than the final summary, ending on a whimsical shot of something near-by, accompanied by a rise signoff. If your lucky a bit of word play fit for a king. Or in other words a regent street. Charlie Brooker, news wipe London."
BROOKER SITTING AT NEWS DESK
"Before long a standard news report, visual language established itself. One that is immediately recognizable to anyone. Me has this report."
CUT TO SHOT OF THREE SKYSCRAPERS
"It starts here, with a lackluster establishing shot of a significant location."
CHARLIE ON A CITY STREET WITH PLAIN FOLKS AROUND HIM
"Next a walkie-talkie preamble from the orator, pacing steadily towards the lens, punctuating every other sentence with a hand gesture, and ignoring all the pricks milling around him like he's gliding through the fucking matrix, before coming to a halt and posing a question. What comes next?"
CUT TO FIVE PEOPLE WALKING SLOWLY TOWARDS THE CAMERA
FADE TO STEEL WALKWAY WITH TWO PEOPLE WALKING TOWARDS EACHOTHER
SLOWLY FADE TO WALKWAY, MONOCHROME FACTS ON STILL SCREEN
"Often something like this a fellow shot designed to give your eyes something to look at while my voice babbles on about facts. Sometimes it will slow down to a halt and monochrome and some of those facts will appear one by one on the screen."
SIX CONSECUTIVE QUICK SHOTS OF OVERWEIGHT PEOPLE
"This is followed by the obligatory shots of overweight people, with their faces subtly framed out, after which the report is padded out with a selection of lazy and pointless vox pops."
CUT TO VOX POP #1
"Um, you usually get some inane chatter from people."
QUICK CUT TO VOX POP #2
"I think they have too much. I think what we want to hear is what is actually happening and not what other people think."
QUICK CUT TO VOX POP #3
"I hate these same sound bites. I don't want some bunter's opinion usually. No!"
SHOT OF PEOPLE BUZZING THROUGH
CUT TO THREE DIFFERENT 2 SECOND CLIPS OF TIME LAPSED SHOTS OF PEOPLE WALKING AROUND ON THE STREETS
QUICK CUT TO DOWDY MAN OPENING MAIL IN KITCHEN
"Another bit of dull, visual abstraction to plug another gap now before the report segways gracefully into a bit of human interest, courtesy of a dowdy man opening letters in a kitchen, and explaining how he's been effected by the issue."
CUT TO DOWDY MAN LOOKING DOWN AT MAIL
MAN TALKING
"When I'm watching the new, I don't really...you know there's a person talking to me telling me what's going on and I don't really listen to what they're saying. It's just news. It's just news."
CUT TO CHART
SILHOUETTE OF AVERAGE FAMILY
"He unfortunately was boring. So to wake you up this is an animated chart, this is a silhouette representing the average family..."
LIGHT HOUSE KEEPER GETTING BEHEADED BY LAZER BEAM
"And this is a light house keeper being beheaded by a lazer beam."
CUT TO FIVE QUICK SHOTS OF PEOPLE WALKING, TAKING PHOTOS, AND A PIPE IN A WINDOW
"As we near the end of the report illustrative shots of pedestrians, and signs, and a pipe in the window."
BROOKER BACK ON SCREEN ON STREET
RISE SIGN OFF TO THE SIGN REGENT STREET
"And than the final summary, ending on a whimsical shot of something near-by, accompanied by a rise signoff. If your lucky a bit of word play fit for a king. Or in other words a regent street. Charlie Brooker, news wipe London."
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